AUTHOR: Marty, a.k.a. canape TITLE: Let's just move on to Thursday, shall we? DATE: 6/16/2010 09:56:00 PM ----- BODY:
Don't ask me why I said it. I don't know. It's a dumb thing to say if you don't really want to leave somewhere.

"Christopher, if you don't start listening to me and calm down, we are going home."

Well, damn if we didn't leave five minutes after me saying that. And I didn't want to leave. Colin and I were enjoying music class - except for the part where Christopher was acting like a little hellion.

It's been that kind of day. Upon leaving music class, we didn't actually go home, we went to the grocery store where I proceeded to do all of my shopping and go to check out only to find that I had no wallet.

Great.

Meanwhile, I'm getting news that my momma has either had a heart attack or a stroke, and they aren't sure which one if either, but she's driven herself home from the store so she can go to the ER. I swear this woman is still alive not because of modern medicine, but because she is just too damn stubborn for cancer.

For crying out loud. I hate this day.

P.S. Momma just finished a hamburger and is enjoying a lovely blood thinner drip now. Doesn't that just somehow seem wrong? Just ribbing you, Momma.

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----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Melissa (@adventuroo) DATE:Wednesday, June 16, 2010 at 10:11:00 PM EDT oh sheesh I'm so sorry about your mom. Hope she's okay!

As for the kiddo, I'm always saying to myself: CRAP I wish I didn't make that threat! I do it all the time so I feel your pain! ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Two Lines On a Stick DATE:Thursday, June 17, 2010 at 1:01:00 AM EDT Prayers for your mom! I miss chatting with you. I still can't reply to anything on the board :( ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Bubblewench DATE:Thursday, June 17, 2010 at 7:11:00 AM EDT I'm so sorry to hear about mom! I will be keeping her in my prayers.

You're kids don't act up!! You lie! You have the two most perfect boys ever! ;) ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous toddlerplanet DATE:Thursday, June 17, 2010 at 11:31:00 AM EDT Any more news about Momma?

Praying and hoping for good news. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Patricia DATE:Thursday, June 17, 2010 at 5:44:00 PM EDT Marty, you & your family are in my thoughts. I, too, pray and hope for good news. ----- -------- AUTHOR: Marty, a.k.a. canape TITLE: Another battle in the war DATE: 4/01/2010 10:29:00 PM ----- BODY:
I hate cancer.

That's a really stupid thing to say. It implies that maybe someone out there doesn't hate it.

Momma's numbers are down and her scans show improvement. Not enough to get a break from chemo, but improvement nonetheless.

My friend Susan, however, did not have clean scans and is facing another battle.

The thing that makes me so angry is not the cancer itself. It's the freaking inconvenience. Susan has things to do. Great things because she is a freaking genius. Great things because she is an awesome mom. Great things that the world will have to wait on because of cancer.

We're brushing off our Team Whymommy badges. We're remembering when the wall of support started. We're lifting prayers and positive energy.

Keep fighting, SuSu. It's worth it. You make the world a better place.

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----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Imstell DATE:Friday, April 2, 2010 at 12:17:00 AM EDT I think I need a new badge since I moved my blog... :-( ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Ilina DATE:Friday, April 2, 2010 at 8:59:00 PM EDT Want to join Team Dirt & Noise in the Race for the Cure? I'm adding Susan to our list, along with my friends Jenn and Jennifer who are mothers battling breast cancer too. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Becki DATE:Friday, April 2, 2010 at 10:34:00 PM EDT So sorry to hear Susan is fighting the fight again :( ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous winecat DATE:Tuesday, April 6, 2010 at 7:42:00 AM EDT Breast cancer sucks the big one. I've almost made it 4 years after being diagnosed with triple negative breast cancer. Fortunately mine was found very, very early (tumor less than 1/4 inch).

I'm almost, yes almost 4 years out - May 6. I'm not a mom but who cares in this ugly battle?

My best wishes to you. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous whymommy DATE:Tuesday, April 6, 2010 at 10:57:00 AM EDT Thanks. Just ... thanks. ----- -------- AUTHOR: Marty, a.k.a. canape TITLE: More birthdays, please. DATE: 11/17/2009 05:53:00 PM ----- BODY:
More birthdays. That's what we keep getting with my momma. It's pretty awesome. There have been so many times when we've been told there would be no more birthdays, and yet today, here she goes again, getting older.

And I thank God everyday that she is.

I'm not just thankful for her birthdays. I'm thankful that she is here for my birthdays, Little Bird's birthdays, everyone's birthdays.

When I was seven, Momma was diagnosed with breast cancer and not given great odds. Then, in 2004 (I think, it's hard to even keep track now), she was diagnosed with ovarian cancer. Both diagnosis came with the very real threat of no more birthdays.

Yet, here she is, turning a glorious and beautiful 69 years old today. Happy birthday, Reverend Mother.

*************************************************************************
Ironically enough, today the U.S. Preventative Services Task Force issued a recommendation against routine mammograms for women in their 40's. They also poo-pooed the idea of regular clinical breast exams and educating women on monthly self breast exams.

From my wording, you can obviously tell that I'm extremely opposed to their recommendations. You can find a slightly less leaning and far more intelligent explanation of their study over at Toddler Planet. It's no surprise that my best friend is once again the voice of reason while I flame emotional.

I have the same emotional reaction to the lack of funding for Inflammatory Breast Cancer research. It doesn't get the funding or attention because not enough women die from it. I dare you to tell the women from Mothers With Cancer that NOT ENOUGH women die from IBC.

It's the same premise that the USPSTF is following though. Meh, only 3% more women died of breast cancer, and HEY! Look at all the money we save not doing routine mammograms on women in their 40's!

Bottom line. Frankly, I think you have to be a real asshole to only be able to see the bottom line. That was supposed to be a pun. I don't think it worked very well.

The American Cancer Society has started promoting "breast awareness" above the "monthly self breast exam." That's still dangerous, because you are really just playing with words there, but it's not the same as recommending that none of it is really that important because only 3% more women died.

Here's the thing, and I totally am stealing this thing from Susan. You have two breasts. If one of them starts to look different than the other, get thee to the doctor that very day. That's breast awareness.

Here's the other thing. I had my first mammogram on my 30th birthday. I haven't had one in about three years now due to pregnancy and breastfeeding, and I probably won't have another one until I'm 40 for the same reasons. But you - all my female friends - you need to be getting them. You need to be checking your boobies, and if you have any family history, tell your doctor you want your mammograms now. Get that baseline and then repeat every year. Your doctor can help you fight your insurance company if you need to. But start now before the world goes INSANE and starts listening to the USPSTF.

Just 3% more. Go ahead. Tell that to the 3%'s families who won't be getting any more birthdays with their loved ones.

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----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous dawn DATE:Tuesday, November 17, 2009 at 8:56:00 PM EST There's gotta be something to go with asshole, bottom line and colonoscopy..... but I'm too drunk to find it.

xoxo ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Mem DATE:Tuesday, November 17, 2009 at 10:14:00 PM EST here here! votes for women! what makes me sad is that a lot of uninformed women will take that as to mean that its not necessary to check your breasts not just that it costs too much. how sad... another way women go without proper care in our horrific american society. and while you can choose to get any test and pay for it yourself, most women won't do that either. sigh. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Anonymous DATE:Wednesday, November 18, 2009 at 4:18:00 AM EST It is extremely interesting for me to read this post. Thanks for it. I like such topics and everything that is connected to them. I definitely want to read a bit more on that blog soon. ----- -------- AUTHOR: Marty, a.k.a. canape TITLE: Living within the lines DATE: 8/29/2008 09:09:00 PM ----- BODY:
There are fine lines between optimism, realism, and pessimism. I wrestle with which lines I will live within all the time.

I am aiming for optimism with a few toes over the line in realism.

It works most of the time. Sometimes it lets me down. Like when Kevin and I were first looking at houses. I was insistent that we needed a guest bed and bath on the first floor for when my parents came to visit us. I didn't want them climbing stairs all the time during their visits.

They aren't coming to visit anymore. They cannot.

My dancing around in optimism land had made me not realize that. It didn't dawn on me that their visit in June was their last visit here.

Now that Momma has started chemo again, I find myself trying so desperately hard to remain optimistic. One thing that has helped that is that I know that the better I am at handling it, the easier it is on her. I didn't understand that until I was a mother. But I understand now that one of the hardest parts of her illness is knowing how much her children hurt for her, and for ourselves.

So I keep my foot, at least one at all times, across the line of optimism. It is all I can do some days to plant it there, but I want to be hopeful.

Hopeful for one more birthday.

One more Christmas.

One more New Year.

Little Bird's first birthday.

And as we pass each milestone, I'll dig my heels in a little more to hope for another.

Because like Andrea, the late Punk Rock Mommy said, "I am not “dying”. I am living with a terminal illness that eventually I will die from." Momma knows this statement well.

Momma is still living. I know it is hard, or rather I can only imagine how hard, to take the chemo again and again. But I'm so grateful for every extra day it gives us with you.

And I am hopeful that we are talking about many many many extra days.

I am so grateful for our trip to BlogHer this year, and for pictures like this.
Little Bird and his Nana.

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----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous toddlerplanet DATE:Saturday, August 30, 2008 at 12:14:00 AM EDT You said it.

And really ... isn't one day at a time the only way to live?

Whether we're looking forward or looking back, we really only do have that day under our control.

Best to you and your Momma and Daddy. (G-Daddy!) ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Jen @ a journey of hope DATE:Saturday, August 30, 2008 at 12:34:00 AM EDT i could have written this post myself, however much less eloquently... esp. the being a mom and knowing how much it hurts our children to see us hurting... so hard. i am trying to live within the lines too, right there with ya. much love. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous gail DATE:Saturday, August 30, 2008 at 8:24:00 AM EDT Momma will always be with you. Much love, many thoughts and even more prayers my friend. I don't even pretend to know how you feel but I am always just a phone call away. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Stella DATE:Saturday, August 30, 2008 at 10:50:00 AM EDT What a beautiful picture.

I've read your Mom's blog a few times and I am always in awe of her total and complete trust in God and faith. It is so inspiring to me, as is her strength.

It really is all about one day at a time and taking what that day brings in the best way possible. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Susie DATE:Saturday, August 30, 2008 at 12:30:00 PM EDT Oh Sweetie, I hear you. Sometimes you wonder who is putting the brave-front up for whom.

Here's to living life - one memory at a time. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Unkempt Mommy DATE:Sunday, August 31, 2008 at 7:43:00 PM EDT I love that picture. And your attitude. {{hugs}} ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Tiffany DATE:Sunday, August 31, 2008 at 11:48:00 PM EDT What a hard time in life it is. You are much more graceful than I could be. Big hugs to you and your family! ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Andria and Co. DATE:Monday, September 1, 2008 at 1:46:00 AM EDT Oh honey, my heart breaks for you. But, I am sure that there will be many many more days of love and sunshine with you, the grandparents, and all those two beautiful kiddos under your roof.

BTW, I found you a house... ;)
http://andria-and-co.com/2008/09/01/house-hunting-for-friends/ ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Magpie DATE:Monday, September 1, 2008 at 3:04:00 PM EDT Oh hon. It's hard, so hard. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Bon DATE:Monday, September 1, 2008 at 3:13:00 PM EDT it's hard when you realize belatedly that the last time really WAS the last time.

but...one day at a time is really all any of us can count on, we just generally aren't forced to face it all the time.

best of luck to your Momma. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Bubblewench DATE:Tuesday, September 2, 2008 at 7:07:00 AM EDT I agree... Your mom is always in my prayers and in my thoughts. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Sarah S. DATE:Tuesday, September 2, 2008 at 12:57:00 PM EDT Your words touched me greatly! I am a mom with cancer and I worry for my girls everyday. One day at a time, live life for the little things that God gives us, little blessings everyday. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Stimey DATE:Friday, September 5, 2008 at 10:21:00 AM EDT It must be so hard. You have such a beautiful attitude, but it must be so hard. I wish you mom success with her chemo. I'll send good thoughts her (and your) way. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Becki DATE:Sunday, September 7, 2008 at 12:53:00 PM EDT How beautifully put. ----- -------- AUTHOR: Marty, a.k.a. canape TITLE: Today DATE: 7/05/2008 08:32:00 PM ----- BODY:
Today, Earth is short a mother and a wife. A writer and an amazing woman.

Today, Heaven gained a very strong soul.

Rest in peace, Andrea.

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----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Susie DATE:Sunday, July 6, 2008 at 12:15:00 PM EDT I know. When I read her last post yesterday, I felt such loss. There is a ripple effect here - strangers in life but friends in this world here. I hope her family will find comfort in her peace. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Daily Verses DATE:Sunday, July 6, 2008 at 9:06:00 PM EDT I just read through her blog. It was gut-wrenching, to say the least. How very sad for her family. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous whymommy DATE:Monday, July 7, 2008 at 7:05:00 PM EDT Damn it. ----- -------- AUTHOR: Marty, a.k.a. canape TITLE: Right now, today DATE: 6/17/2008 06:00:00 PM ----- BODY:
Christopher has been baptized. Sunday, his Nana stood in front of the congregation with us and baptized her youngest grandson.

I honestly didn't think that we would get to see this day. I didn't think my mom would be here for this day.

My momma and I had good conversations last week. There is something about a daughter becoming a mother that makes the grandmother/mother and mother/daughter bond even stronger. I feel closer to my mother than I ever have before.

While we were talking last week, I realized that I've spent an awful lot of time and energy on being sad for my parents' health. Granted, they rarely get good news when they go to the doctor, but so far, neither of them have been told that they were going to die that same day.

Susan's post, A moment spent moping, really hit home. It's not just the patients who are angry at cancer or spend their time wishing for the "what could have been's" of a different diagnosis. As the daughter of an ovarian cancer patient and a Parkinson's patient, I do the exact same thing.

What this means is that I have spent the past six years mourning the loss of my parents over and over and over again. Every time there is a new diagnosis, I mourn.

That seems like a complete waste of time now.

Each day that I still have them is a gift.

In all honesty, it doesn't always feel that way. Each day that I still have my mother is a gift, but some of the days with Daddy are down right hard. I have so much anger for what has been taken from him and from us. It is harder to apply the "each day is a gift" to a disease which erodes my father's mind and body in waves of dust and huge chunks of his life.

But Momma.

Her scans are not clean. Her ca125 is rising again. She will start chemo again, maybe this fall.

And I can type that without crying. Finally.

Momma is still here. She is still fighting. She is still winning. Right now.

Every minute I spend thinking ahead at what she will miss is a minute I've spent not enjoying her while she's here.

She was here to meet my child. She was here to hold my child. She was here to baptize my child. All things that I had mourned the loss of in 2002 when she was diagnosed with stage 3B ovarian cancer.

Sure. My momma is going to die much sooner than I would like for her to, and we all know it. The knowing makes it hard. But would there be a time in my life when I wouldn't be devastated to lose her? She could be 97 years old and I would still be heartbroken when she passed.

So today I vow to stop mourning my parents before they are gone. It's not fair to them, and it's not good for me.

That also means, Momma, that you have to stop labeling all your stuff all the time too. I may love your pewter goblets, but I don't want them anytime soon.

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----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Jen DATE:Tuesday, June 17, 2008 at 6:28:00 PM EDT beautiful post, M.

i'm trying desperately to wrap my head around the "live for the moment" idea but my mom is just falling apart under the weight of her diagnosis and i am unravelling myself with the fears of what is to come... i just had no idea how much grieving there was to this, and i don't know how to help her which is the hardest part. she's pushing me away right now saying you just don't understand, and i guess i really don't (how can i?) but i am pretty sure what she's doing now isn't good for her and how can i get her to believe in HOPE and live for right now, today? i'm so lost. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous toddlerplanet DATE:Tuesday, June 17, 2008 at 6:48:00 PM EDT I love this. Good for you, Canape. I like to see you more positive.

It's not easy ... on either side ... but all you can do is try.

Jen -- my heart goes out to you today. I think it's very very hard to learn to put the sadness aside. How long has your mom had to mourn? She may need a few days; she may need more. And while it's true you don't understand, and I think you both know that, it's wonderful that you're there. What about if you started with "I know I don't understand, Mom, but I want you to know that I love you and I'm here for you." Then just sit with her one day. Go with her to treatment if she's having any. Bring a book, your knitting, or a picture album that you always wanted to go through with her. Keep her company, right where she is.

Just some ideas -- I'm not a professional. Is there a professional at your mom's hospital who works with families who could help you both with perspective? There's a lot out there.... ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Andria and Co. DATE:Tuesday, June 17, 2008 at 7:26:00 PM EDT What a great post. I too spend too much time sometimes in the past, and fearing the worst. Like Jen said, I'm trying to wrap my head around living for the moment.
Lol at the labeling bit-- My mom is one of 7, and at my Grandma's house, if you flip over any random object you will find a name scrawled in pencil or pen. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Clifford DATE:Tuesday, June 17, 2008 at 8:00:00 PM EDT Every minute you sit there coulda-shoulda-woulda-ing is one less that you could be doing something to make the people involved happy. Like your folks, who're alive and functional btw. And yourself. By calling them on that telephone thingie that us 30-somethings trashed long ago in favor of Mr. Qwerty. Or doing whatever else twists your tootsie rolls and those of your parents.

Kick this pity stuff to the curb, Mar-tay. Worthless. Now or anytime. Absolutely, totally, completely worthless. Love on your folks and family and forget the rest of whatever it is you waste time worrying about.

Hugs, kisses, & baseball-

Cliff ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Susie DATE:Tuesday, June 17, 2008 at 8:11:00 PM EDT Not only is this such a touching post, all the comments are as well. My mother is a breast cancer survivor and I often forget how easily I could have lost her. Especially with her living so far away, it was easy to put it all out of my mind. When my folks visit, I worry about their future - how they handle their money and their health. It's hard to just be grateful they are here and my kids have relationships with them. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous whymommy DATE:Tuesday, June 17, 2008 at 8:26:00 PM EDT Hey, on a brighter note, where are the BAPTISM PHOTOS? I wanna see some yummy baby pics! ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous pastormargaret DATE:Tuesday, June 17, 2008 at 10:35:00 PM EDT Thanks for what you wrote, precious daughter of mine. I do, indeed, live for today. It's what I know we have, but I also think about the what if's and the things I know to be true about this terrible disease. I think about Dad and want to scream at the injustice of it all. Being with you, holding my youngest makes me think about the future even more--not the one with a family member missing, but one with all of us present, remembering memories of old and making some of our own, those you will share with your grandchildren. Dad and I are blessed beyond measure!! And we know it! ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Clifford DATE:Tuesday, June 17, 2008 at 10:52:00 PM EDT Hi there Mrs. S! Hope you are good. Northpointe is not the same without you guys there. :) ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Kelly DATE:Wednesday, June 18, 2008 at 2:42:00 PM EDT Great post! I'm glad you are trying to stop mourning now. You are right, you'll never be really ready to lose a parent. Enjoy them now. Losing my mom was the hardest thing I've ever been through, but I'm thankful for the things we did experience together.

My grandma does the labeling too ;) ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Daily Verses DATE:Wednesday, June 18, 2008 at 11:10:00 PM EDT Very inspiring perspectives, from everyone. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous mamma knows DATE:Thursday, June 19, 2008 at 12:47:00 PM EDT The unknown is so scary, enjoy them. Great post. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous katy DATE:Thursday, June 19, 2008 at 3:57:00 PM EDT No one knows what tomorrow holds and we all would be better off if we could live for today...but it is hard when you KNOW your tomorrows are limited. I hope you can stop mourning them before their time....its a beautiful though and a gift for them and for your son. ----- -------- AUTHOR: Marty, a.k.a. canape TITLE: Had to change the title of this one DATE: 5/16/2008 02:05:00 PM ----- BODY:
This summer, we will head to the beach with Whymommy and her family. For a celebration. Not a goodbye. I cannot put into words how thankful I am for that.

Susan has always been my "see it from a different perspective" friend. The friend who makes me think outside of my box.

In high school, my box was very very tiny, so that wasn't a hard thing. One foot in either direction had me reeling outside of my box. She was very patient with my tiny little private school mind.

Over the years, we have talked, traveled, cried (but not much because we are oh so strong women who really need to get more comfortable with a tissue), laughed, and learned together. She lasted in the learning part far past I did. I bored easily with school, and she tackled it with a vengeance.

She was on the same trip to Mexico which generated the most embarrassing story of my entire life. And she still loves me. I don't know why.

She read my angst filled, totally rhyming poetry in high school. And she still loves me.

She listened to my angst filled, I'll never be Debbie Gibson or Amy Grant, songs in high school. Even sang the harmony. And she still loves me.

She stood up for me at my first wedding even when she knew it was a mistake. Even when her grandmother had just passed away. Even when the dress I made her wear was distinctively pink. And flowy.

She told me the truth about those first weeks of motherhood. She called to check on me, not just the baby. She coaxed me through the darkest days with wisdom and compassion. And she still loves me.

Blogging is funny sometimes. I sat down to write an entirely different post. A post about getting Bird prepared to go to the beach with little hats and swim trunks. And yet, when I let my fingers go, freely typing without thinking (which gets me into trouble more times than not), this is what appeared.

After almost a year of holding my breath and praying for a miracle, here we are planning to meet up at the beach. To celebrate.

It's clear to me that she is worth celebrating. It's clear that I'm lucky to have her as my friend.

It needs to be said that I am so thankful for her treatment and results.

So very very thankful.

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----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Candygirlflies DATE:Friday, May 16, 2008 at 5:32:00 PM EDT What a beautiful post, Canape. Just beautiful.

I'll be thinking about you at the beach next week, and look forward to all the happy details! What a wonderful way to celebrate--know that I'm with you in my heart!

You and WM have a very special friendship... I wish that everyone could be so lucky, to find that sort of "kindred spirit" in another person!

Lots of love to you all--

xoxo CGF ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Susie DATE:Friday, May 16, 2008 at 8:28:00 PM EDT And thank you for leading me to Susan's blog - which I love and read daily. Two years ago, my best friend battled, almost lost, and beat a terrible cancer diagnosis. I felt so helpless and far away - I totally identified with your side of her story. I am so glad you will be celebrating at the beach together!
Enjoy! ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous whymommy DATE:Friday, May 16, 2008 at 8:58:00 PM EDT Hey, babe. Of course I still love you! And know what? There was more than one embarrassing story to come out of that Mexico trip. :-)

But hey, once you've had scorpions crawl on you, you're friends for life, right? ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Ally DATE:Friday, May 16, 2008 at 9:39:00 PM EDT I am thankful, too, for Canape's successful treatment, and for the chance to get to know her, and you. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous PunditMom DATE:Saturday, May 17, 2008 at 11:54:00 AM EDT That is so wonderful! Hopefully, no scorpions! ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Tiffany DATE:Saturday, May 17, 2008 at 2:00:00 PM EDT What a wonderful post. I am thankful you get to celebrate without even knowing her! ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Michelle Lynn DATE:Saturday, May 17, 2008 at 8:48:00 PM EDT Wonderful post, wonderful thing to celebrate. I hope you have a spectacular trip! ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Bubblewench DATE:Monday, May 19, 2008 at 6:28:00 AM EDT Totally awesome post.. Yes, do celebrate! You both deserve it. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Jessica @ A Bushel and a Peck DATE:Monday, May 19, 2008 at 10:26:00 AM EDT That is a lovely tribute to a great friend...have a blast at the beach!!! ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Jessica DATE:Monday, May 19, 2008 at 7:40:00 PM EDT you two are so lucky to have one another... Have a WONDERFUL time. :) ----- -------- AUTHOR: Marty, a.k.a. canape TITLE: Survivor DATE: 4/18/2008 10:37:00 PM ----- BODY:
In case you missed the news, my best friend kicked cancer's ass.

Please go congratulate her.

Woot!

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----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Andria and Co. DATE:Friday, April 18, 2008 at 11:48:00 PM EDT Hooray!!!!!!!!!!!!! ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Stimey DATE:Saturday, April 19, 2008 at 2:05:00 PM EDT Double woot! ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Candygirlflies DATE:Saturday, April 19, 2008 at 9:06:00 PM EDT I've been thinking about you, Canape, ever since I heard the news. You must be over the moon!

Congratulations to YOU, for standing by Susan, for being so strong and supportive during this difficult time. You are a true, True Friend.

I'm so proud to have been counted as one of the members of your Team!

Loads of love, CGF xo ----- -------- AUTHOR: Marty, a.k.a. canape TITLE: Boobless DATE: 1/23/2008 08:25:00 PM ----- BODY:
Thank God.

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----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Mamma DATE:Wednesday, January 23, 2008 at 9:31:00 PM EST There just couldn't be better news!! ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Stimey DATE:Thursday, January 24, 2008 at 12:11:00 AM EST Yay! ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous ~JJ! DATE:Thursday, January 24, 2008 at 9:39:00 AM EST I KNOW, Right? ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous katy DATE:Thursday, January 24, 2008 at 1:38:00 PM EST I am so happy for her that this is finally over. It has to be hard to just sit and wait.
I hope you aren't just sitting around today with your feet up. According to my baby pool guess you have less than two hours to get little bird out...Push woman push. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous slouchy DATE:Thursday, January 24, 2008 at 9:20:00 PM EST It's fabulous.

And so is the fact that you are in LABOR! I'm so happy for you and can't wait to meet Little Bird. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Stella DATE:Thursday, January 24, 2008 at 10:39:00 PM EST I hear you're in labor! I lost the pool but so excited to hear about your new little bird!! ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Jennie DATE:Friday, January 25, 2008 at 8:04:00 AM EST Wonderful news! Praying for her recovery.

AND....the next post I couldn't comment on for some reason. But it's not true anymore!!! Yay!!! ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Lisa DATE:Friday, January 25, 2008 at 8:18:00 PM EST Sending you vibes of strength, pushy strength! heehee. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous katy DATE:Saturday, January 26, 2008 at 1:54:00 PM EST Why mommy said you were in labor two days ago. Whether it was false labor and you are sitting around waiting or whether it was true labor and little bird is here, I wish you the best....Good luck! ----- -------- AUTHOR: Marty, a.k.a. canape TITLE: Tomorrow DATE: 1/21/2008 10:59:00 AM ----- BODY:
Tomorrow is the day.

I want nothing more than to get in my car and go sit with WonderDaddy tomorrow. Or stay at the house and play with the boys. Have a cup of coffee with the parents. Anything.

Just to be there.

All I can do though, is sit here and hold her hand virtually.

We've waited for this day for a long time now. Please go over and leave Susan a comment.

Better yet, I think it would be awesome if there were posts all over the blogosphere that wished her luck. All of them titled "Tomorrow."

Please? Just a quick post, link to her post, and title it "Tomorrow." Thanks.

Harmony In Motion
Two Is Now Three
Two Lines on a Stick
It's Not About That Anyway
Around the Island
A Mother's Musings
Anderson Family
Pretty Babies
I Can Fly, Just Not Up
The Further Adventures of SpaceMom
GoodyBlog
Lawyer Mama
Useless Ramblings
Tumble Dry
House of H
Fertile Mertile
What Works for Us
Mountain Momma
Dirty Laundry
Mamma Loves
Stimeyland
Slouching Mom
Motherhood Uncensored
My Life As It Is
Crib Chronicles
Karaoke Diva
Live from the Wang of America
Mom 22 Teens
A Bead a Day
The Estrogen Files
The Farm House Kids
The Dairy Wife
The Dana Files
Playgroups Are No Place for Children
Petroville
Daily Verses
Little Buggas
Sarah and the Goon Squad
Zone Family
Life with Our Little Ladies
Andria and Co.
"That" Psycho Family
Sassafrass
Ladybug & Lizards
Plans2Match
Miss Zoot
Nervous Girl
Mom, Ma'am, Me
I Can't Complain Anymore Than Usual
Mommy Dance
Slacker-moms-r-us
The Blogs of Life
Midwestern Mommy
Mommy to the Snugglebunnies
Hearts Wide Open
Baby Cubed
Sunrays and Saturdays
Chicken and Cheese
Her Bad Mother

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----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Mamma DATE:Monday, January 21, 2008 at 11:43:00 AM EST How did you know what I was going to post about today?

I've been thinking about how to harness the positive power of this amazing blogging community. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Robin DATE:Monday, January 21, 2008 at 2:08:00 PM EST Done.

http://aroundtheisland.blogspot.com/2008/01/tomorrow.html ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Sara DATE:Monday, January 21, 2008 at 3:04:00 PM EST great idea mines up ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Steph DATE:Monday, January 21, 2008 at 3:39:00 PM EST http://livngabesmomma.blogspot.com/2008/01/tomorrow.html

I left her some love too! ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous ~JJ! DATE:Monday, January 21, 2008 at 4:04:00 PM EST Done!

http://airmydirtylaundry.wordpress.com/2008/01/21/tomorrow/ ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Lisa DATE:Monday, January 21, 2008 at 4:11:00 PM EST I don't have a blog but left Susan a Tomorrow note. Thanks so much for doing this!
Lisa ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Stella DATE:Monday, January 21, 2008 at 4:18:00 PM EST All done!!

www.mommountain.blogspot.com ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous MamaGeek @ Works For Us DATE:Monday, January 21, 2008 at 4:21:00 PM EST EXCELLENT idea.

I'm definitely in. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Stimey DATE:Monday, January 21, 2008 at 5:33:00 PM EST Great idea. I'm so happy the day is finally here!

Tomorrow ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Candygirlflies DATE:Monday, January 21, 2008 at 5:40:00 PM EST Mine's up, too!!

Love to you, Canape...

xoxo CGF

http://icanflyjustnotup.blogspot.com/ ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous useless_rambler DATE:Monday, January 21, 2008 at 6:23:00 PM EST I sent my link to you in email. Oh, wouldn't it be great if you were able to be there?!? I feel so helpless... I believe in the power, though. I just *know* all this positive energy won't go unnoticed.

Take care of you and Bird, too!!! ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous The Estrogen Files DATE:Monday, January 21, 2008 at 7:02:00 PM EST Mine's up. I also sent you an email:

http://smcarney.blogspot.com/2008/01/tomorrow.html ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous katy DATE:Monday, January 21, 2008 at 7:25:00 PM EST Mine is up... I will be thinking about whymommy all day tomorrow....take care of little bird and yourself.
http://myersfamily-mom.blogspot.com/ ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous FENICLE DATE:Monday, January 21, 2008 at 7:43:00 PM EST I left her a comment earlier today. My prayers & thoughts are with her and the family. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Robin DATE:Monday, January 21, 2008 at 8:20:00 PM EST Done.
http://wwwmylifeasitis.blogspot.com/

It's times like this that the blogging world gives me the warm fuzzies. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Bon DATE:Monday, January 21, 2008 at 8:20:00 PM EST done. in a roundabout way, but done.

http://cribchronicles.com/2008/01/21/tomorrow-here-and-there/ ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous motherhood uncensored DATE:Monday, January 21, 2008 at 8:22:00 PM EST Mine is up here:

http://motherhooduncensored.typepad.com/motherhood_uncensored/2008/01/tomorrow-brave.html ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous The Farm House Kids DATE:Tuesday, January 22, 2008 at 1:51:00 AM EST Done! What a glorious day "tomorrow" is going to be for Susan ... the beginning of the rest of her life.

Tanya ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Lisa DATE:Tuesday, January 22, 2008 at 9:41:00 AM EST Here you go...

http://lifewithourlittleladies.blogspot.com/2008/01/please-read.html ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Becki DATE:Tuesday, January 22, 2008 at 10:38:00 AM EST Mine is brief, but has been up since yesterday.

http://adventuresofanervousgirl.typepad.com/nervous_girl/ ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Chick DATE:Tuesday, January 22, 2008 at 12:45:00 PM EST a day late but am happy happy happy to... just left her a hug and a good mojo comment

you are a badass chick friend. happy to have found you in blogland. thank you for your lovely comment on my icebreaker post

and I LOVE your belly slideshow!!! ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Lisa DATE:Tuesday, January 22, 2008 at 3:07:00 PM EST My post is up! Its late but its there. :-)

http://midwesternmommy.com/ ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Kendra DATE:Tuesday, January 22, 2008 at 4:01:00 PM EST Somehow the email about posting tomorrow just came to my inbox. I posted one for today instead.

http://shawnandkendra.blogspot.com/2008/01/today.html ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Slackermommy DATE:Tuesday, January 22, 2008 at 5:29:00 PM EST I'm a bit late.

http://www.slacker-moms-r-us.com/2008/01/tomorrow.html ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Bubblewench DATE:Wednesday, January 23, 2008 at 10:30:00 AM EST Totall late but done

Done: http://bubblewench.blogspot.com/2008/01/tomorrow-is-today.html ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Lawyer Mama DATE:Wednesday, January 23, 2008 at 10:13:00 PM EST Ahhh, look at all those wonderful posts! ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous whymommy DATE:Saturday, January 26, 2008 at 3:28:00 PM EST You all made me cry. Thank you. And thank you, Canape! AND LITTLE BIRD, for being so patient and helping your Mommy! Whoo-hoo! ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Izzy DATE:Sunday, January 27, 2008 at 2:46:00 PM EST I was out of commission with dueling sick kids so I missed this but I did read on WM's blog that the surgery went well, thankfully, and she is doing good, all things considered. You are such an awesome friend, Miss Canape. I suspect you've accumulated boatloads and boatloads of good karma by now.

I hope you're off having that sweet little baby now that you can exhale! ----- -------- AUTHOR: Marty, a.k.a. canape TITLE: Countdown DATE: 1/17/2008 08:29:00 PM ----- BODY:
Single digits. The counter on the left is in single digits. That doesn't mean a whole lot I suppose. It is only an estimated due date, after all. The fact that the word "February" came out of the doctor's mouth today did not slip past me. I heard it.

Someone else is in single digits. Whymommy, my dear Susan, is five days away from her surgery.

This has been floating around in my head all month, as I've been watching our respective countdowns. I thought there would be something poetic to say about it. Some sort of literary bit to compose.

But there isn't.

We just find ourselves both waiting.

And it does feel like we are both getting our second chances at the same time.

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----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous katy DATE:Thursday, January 17, 2008 at 11:27:00 PM EST I left a comment for whymommy today and told her that she and little bird were going to start a new life around the same time.
My car is fine... SH's not so much but it is interesting to see the perfect imprint of an electric pole.
Little bird knows he is better in his little 98.6 degree sauna than out in this snowy cold world right now. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous slouchy DATE:Friday, January 18, 2008 at 12:01:00 AM EST so soon, my friend, so soon... ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Candygirlflies DATE:Friday, January 18, 2008 at 9:53:00 AM EST Honey, that sounded pretty darn poetic to me.

I'm so excited for BOTH of you...

xoxo CGF

ps. You get some SLEEP, now!! ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous toddlerplanet DATE:Friday, January 18, 2008 at 10:12:00 AM EST We are, we are, we are!

But I wish....

Oh, nevermind. We'll both be here with our babies soon, and it will all be well again. It will.

(I'm always surprised when you leave me a comment because I'm CONVINCED that you're off having the baby already.... Soon, hon, soon. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous labugga DATE:Friday, January 18, 2008 at 2:43:00 PM EST So close!! ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Imstell DATE:Friday, January 18, 2008 at 3:20:00 PM EST I'm a teeny, tiny bit jealous. I never even got within the same calendar page as either of my due dates. Believe it or not, it's sort of disappointing to graduate early - even if it is because you've got a really cool gift coming that just can't wait. *sigh*. Enjoy your last few days of doing whatever you want whenever YOU WANT TO DO IT. That's all over after Bird arrives... Bwa, ha, ha! ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Jessica R. DATE:Tuesday, January 29, 2008 at 5:33:00 PM EST Is no news good news?
Where's that baby?
Hoping all is well! ----- -------- AUTHOR: Marty, a.k.a. canape TITLE: In case it hadn't struck you yet DATE: 1/03/2008 09:21:00 PM ----- BODY:
Today is Thursday.

And Whymommy didn't have to have chemo today.

This is the bestest Thursday in quite awhile.

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----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous slouchy DATE:Thursday, January 3, 2008 at 9:32:00 PM EST Yes. Yes, it is! ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Candygirlflies DATE:Thursday, January 3, 2008 at 9:35:00 PM EST YIPPEE!!!

xo CGF ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Mamma DATE:Thursday, January 3, 2008 at 9:54:00 PM EST Oooh! That is good news. I've been so out of the loop what with my blogging break.

Thank goodness you haven't had that baby yet. I bet you're ready. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Clifford DATE:Thursday, January 3, 2008 at 10:01:00 PM EST I wonder what Sus feels like right now. I mean, with the tiny white flag being waved inside her chest and all. Haha. Shoulda thought of that before you picked on my buddy, IBC. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous ladybugsnlizards DATE:Thursday, January 3, 2008 at 10:06:00 PM EST That is awesome news! What a good day. :o) ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Stimey DATE:Friday, January 4, 2008 at 12:31:00 AM EST Hell. Yes. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Stella DATE:Friday, January 4, 2008 at 8:54:00 AM EST That's WONDERFUL!! ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous labugga DATE:Friday, January 4, 2008 at 11:07:00 AM EST A great day, indeed! ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Bubblewench DATE:Friday, January 4, 2008 at 1:31:00 PM EST That is great to hear. Awesome. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Beautifully Unique DATE:Friday, January 4, 2008 at 7:16:00 PM EST Great! :) ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous toddlerplanet DATE:Sunday, January 6, 2008 at 10:16:00 PM EST Thanks, babe! It was great not to go. ----- -------- AUTHOR: Marty, a.k.a. canape TITLE: Semantics of cancer DATE: 12/05/2007 02:31:00 PM ----- BODY:
Whymommy linked to this post by Punk Rock Mommy yesterday. It isn't someone I have read before, but as far as reading a first post goes, this one will be sticking with me for quite some time.

Momma and I have talked about her chemo some. It doesn't dominate our conversations. It doesn't dominate her life.

There will be a time that she has to decide though, if the quality of life the chemo leaves her with is worth fighting for. She has assured me that now is not that time. I believe her.

The truth of the matter though is that Momma has cancer. She has cancer that will eventually lead to her death. We know this. What we don't know is how soon that will be. Of course we hope and pray it will be very far off. And maybe it will. We certainly have great hope and faith in that.

And so today, I found so much comfort in these words from Andrea, Punk Rock Mommy:

I am not “dying”. I am living with a terminal illness that eventually I will die from.

Andrea, Susan, my momma, are all people living with cancer. What an important distinction to make.

The last time my momma was going through chemo, I didn't call her much. I felt like I didn't have anything important enough to say. Like her time on earth here was precious and if I couldn't think of something wildly intelligent or relevant, that I probably shouldn't waste her energy.

I am a moron.

As Susan and I chatted on the phone this weekend, we laughed about old boyfriends. We talked about babies and naptime. We giggled like friends. Because we are. Susan is living with cancer and doing a damn fine job of it too. Adapting and adjusting to be the best mother, wife, daughter, and friend she can be. I would say it is amazing, but it's not.

It's just who she is and what she does.

So I add Andrea and her family to my prayers, and I say thank you to her for her words. Words that have reminded me once again that my momma and Susan are doing a superb job of living.

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----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Jennifer DATE:Wednesday, December 5, 2007 at 3:26:00 PM EST What an important reminder. And such an important distinction.

Great post.

Jennifer ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous pastormargaret DATE:Wednesday, December 5, 2007 at 6:56:00 PM EST Your words continue to touch the depths of my being. And your words are never empty or irrelevant. You should know by now that any time spent in conversation--frivolous, intelligent, whatever--with you and/or Bro makes my day. Yes, I am living with this dumb cancer just as Dad is living with Parkinson's. We may not have really long lives, but we have really good ones! ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous slouchy DATE:Wednesday, December 5, 2007 at 9:38:00 PM EST Amen. Yes, yes, and more yes. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous whymommy DATE:Wednesday, December 5, 2007 at 9:58:00 PM EST Yeah. And I'll focus on that again too. Even if sometimes I need reminding. As Abreast in the World said today, TODAY is the best day of my life. And tomorrow will be even better.

I'd hug you, if I could get my arms around you! ;-) ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Ally DATE:Wednesday, December 5, 2007 at 11:27:00 PM EST I haven't read the post yet but will do so now. This rings very true, and there is so much power in words that it really is important to get it right. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Chick DATE:Thursday, December 6, 2007 at 11:43:00 AM EST wow. thanks a million for commenting on CFT b/c now I have found you! loved getting to know you thru your blog which is wonderful. I just want to know more more more! where in NC? (I went to chapel hill)...fun that I have Little Chick and you have Little Bird on the way. really thanks again and I've subscribed. you have a new fan...cheers ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Jenn DATE:Thursday, December 6, 2007 at 3:04:00 PM EST Yes.

Exactly.

It's what I said to WhyMommy.

It's about the living, all about the living. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Bubblewench DATE:Friday, December 7, 2007 at 6:38:00 AM EST Awesome post. ----- -------- AUTHOR: Marty, a.k.a. canape TITLE: Haiku Friday and I hate cancer, but who doesn't? DATE: 11/09/2007 07:36:00 PM ----- BODY:
Not in the mood for
Writing good haiku tonight
Chemo next Friday.


Find more and better haiku here.

*********

We are not foolish enough to think that Momma wouldn't have to go back on chemo at some point. Her cancer is a chronic condition. We know that.

So when she called today, and I could hear the news in the tone of her voice before her words were spoken, I didn't crumble. It didn't feel like a crisis. I didn't immediately run through all of the things I needed to cancel in order to catch a plane.

Now that they have moved, thank God, they are near my brother. Bro and Sil are great with them, and the grandchildren bring joy into their lives. There will be help. There will not be Daddy taking Momma a piece of bread folded in half and calling it a sandwich. Bless his heart. This is so huge. I'm so grateful that they are near family now.

I think she will be okay. I think they will zap it back again this time. I think that she will live long enough to know Little Bird and for Little Bird to fall completely madly for her.

But she won't be here in January. Not for the birth. After all the wrestling with whether or not it was a good idea for them to be here, the coming to terms with how I wanted her here even it was more work because of Daddy, after all that?

It isn't even an option.

And of course, that makes me want her more than ever. And I just feel really sad.

But I also want you for a long time, so we will compromise. Stay there and fight now. Come here after you've kicked some more cancer in the tush. Little Bird will want you to stick around for a long time.

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----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous slouchy DATE:Friday, November 9, 2007 at 8:24:00 PM EST Oh, damn. I'm sorry. Really sorry. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Steph DATE:Friday, November 9, 2007 at 8:33:00 PM EST Im sad for you reading this. Im sorry about your momma not being at the birth, but will pray and believe for her to kick her cancer! ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Candygirlflies DATE:Friday, November 9, 2007 at 9:32:00 PM EST Oh, Canape... How I wish I could give you a big ((hug)) in person.

xo CGF ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous pastormargaret DATE:Saturday, November 10, 2007 at 9:17:00 AM EST Thank you for your words. They mean more and say more than you can even imagine. Dad says the birth is not out of the picture yet and you know the power of determination genes on both sides of your family. I love you for who you are. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Patois DATE:Saturday, November 10, 2007 at 9:38:00 AM EST Such a heart-wrenching haiku. Very moving. So sorry for you and your mom. Wishing her big success. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous gail DATE:Saturday, November 10, 2007 at 10:15:00 AM EST I am so sorry my friend. I wanted my Mom so bad. I can only think you feel very much like I did and I would have been crushed had she not been there... you, your Mom, you family, they're always in our thoughts and prayers... pat that Bird from me. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Stella DATE:Saturday, November 10, 2007 at 11:54:00 AM EST I'm so sorry ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Mrs. Chicken DATE:Saturday, November 10, 2007 at 11:33:00 PM EST I can't imagine. I'm so sorry. Cancer is a horrible disease, not only for the patient. It destroys so much in our lives that should be joyous.

But you'll have her. That is what counts, and she'll meet your Bird. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Stimey DATE:Sunday, November 11, 2007 at 3:57:00 PM EST I'm so sorry. I'll be thinking of you and your mom. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Jenn DATE:Sunday, November 11, 2007 at 8:10:00 PM EST I can't imagine; I'm so caught up in her and I don't even really know her.

Wish I could hug you right now, but know that I'm praying for you.

For all of you. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Magpie DATE:Sunday, November 11, 2007 at 8:13:00 PM EST I'm sorry - I hope she kicks cancer's butt and good. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous labugga DATE:Sunday, November 11, 2007 at 9:25:00 PM EST I have no words. Just hugs and prayers. I'm so very, very sorry, but I will send all my hope and positive thinking your way. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous MamaGeek @ Works For Us DATE:Sunday, November 11, 2007 at 10:36:00 PM EST Canape, I'm so sincerely sorry too. So sorry.

My Mom has 'chronic' cancer too and every 6 months we wait for the news - to do chemo or not to do chemo. It weighs heavily on my heart, mind (and plans) at all times. But we do, what we have to do.

I feel your pain and will keep you all in my thoughts and prayers. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Bubblewench DATE:Monday, November 12, 2007 at 9:23:00 AM EST I'm sorry. Lots of prayers for Mom. I have faith that she'll kick it! God is on her side. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Jennifer, Playgroups Are No Place For Children DATE:Monday, November 12, 2007 at 4:17:00 PM EST Damn. I'm sorry. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Ally DATE:Tuesday, November 13, 2007 at 5:08:00 PM EST I'm sorry for your mama having to go through this again. And for you, that she won't be at Little Bird's birth. I know that is a very big deal. Please pass on my love to your mama and let her know she's in my prayers.

You are, too, you know. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Kathy's Surprise Party DATE:Wednesday, November 14, 2007 at 6:20:00 PM EST I'm sorry. Big, tight, long hugs for you and the family. ----- -------- AUTHOR: Marty, a.k.a. canape TITLE: Alone again, for now DATE: 10/29/2007 01:19:00 PM ----- BODY:
The house is quiet. Momma and Daddy left this morning. Lovely is at school and then goes to her mother's house for a couple of days. Guy is at work. Always at work. It's just me and the pups for now.

Daddy did very well here, I thought. The stairs are problematic, but we couldn't do anything about that. He was up and down during the night and got off of his medicine schedule one day, but these are things that happen at home too. Overall, I thought the visit went well, and I don't think it will be as much work as was anticipated if they come for Bird's arrival in January.

Daddy is used to doing things and being the boss man. It is difficult to keep your patience with him now that he needs constant help, but then tells you how to do what he needs help with. Either that, or he wants you to help him right that second, even if you are already doing something else for him. I know it must be one of the many things that frustrates Momma, and with good reason. I just hope she doesn't feel guilty for being frustrated or out of patience sometimes.

Taking them to the 3D ultrasound was my favorite part of the week. They were really excited to get to see Bird, and the tech even printed some extra pictures for them to take back. It was incredibly cool to get to share that with them.

And the trip was happy. Even with Momma's scans looming in the near future and the reality of more chemo getting closer by the day, it was a happy trip. Of course, we are comparing that to our last two visits, one of which I lost a baby, and the other of which she was in the ICU on a ventilator. Not exactly tough competition for this trip. But we were happy. Or at least, I was. I know Momma's worried that she may not get to see Little Bird other than in those pictures, but I just don't believe that. I think she will team up with chemo again and push the cancer back at least once more.

If it's even there. We don't even know if it's there yet.

Last night, the five of us played a domino game that Daddy had been wanting to teach Lovely all week. The strange thing was, he couldn't remember how to play it. Every time we got to his turn, we had to explain the rules again. He tried to quit because he was holding us up, he said, but nobody minded. So he stayed, and he played. And even with the bizarre fact that he had to be retaught how to play with every round, there was so much of his old self there. He joked around and even broke out into the same random song that Guy did at one point. We all laughed. A lot. And it was good.

But now it is quiet. And I'm facing the third trimester.

This baby is going to be here before we know it.

I hope we are ready.

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----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Andria DATE:Monday, October 29, 2007 at 2:34:00 PM EDT You are ready, and you are going to be a wonderful mother. :)
That breaks my heart about your parents. They seem like such wonderful, caring, loving people. I hope they are around for a long, long time, and get to see your and Hubby's kids grow a little older.

As much as you love company, isn't it nice to have the house nice and quiet once again?! ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Magpie DATE:Monday, October 29, 2007 at 3:47:00 PM EDT Oh, heartbreaking about your parents.

It's nice though that they got to go to the u/s - I rather wanted my mom to come to one, but we just couldn't make it happen. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Tiffany DATE:Monday, October 29, 2007 at 5:13:00 PM EDT You are SO ready!! You're ready because it's who you are, and you are a FANTASTIC mama!!

I loved hearing about your Dad and how much fun he had playing the game. What a blessing.

And I know 100% that your Mom will be around to see Little Bird, I'm accepting nothing else!

Miss you and can't wait to "meet" the babe! ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Mamma DATE:Monday, October 29, 2007 at 6:03:00 PM EDT Oh I'm glad it went well.

Momma will be there. She will. I know it.

How incredible that they got to be there for the ultrasound. Very cool.

Get your rest chica. That babe-o-lah will be here before you know it. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous katy DATE:Monday, October 29, 2007 at 7:40:00 PM EDT The funny thing about babies is they show up when they are ready...and you just adjust! You will be surprised how ready to are, even if there are a few things left undone. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Liz DATE:Monday, October 29, 2007 at 8:16:00 PM EDT You're ready. You were ready a long, long time ago.

Your visit sounds lovely, and I'm so happy that you had this time with them. You will always, always treasure this. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Candygirlflies DATE:Monday, October 29, 2007 at 8:48:00 PM EDT You are going to be a fantastic mother, Canape... You already are to Lovely. I just can't wait to see that Little Bird in "person", his ultrasound shots were so gorgeous.

Your parents actually sound much better than I thought they would be, after everything you've told us about them. I understand about your dad's "deterioration"... my own f-i-l went through Altzheimer's disease when I was expecting my first child. But, he lived to see his first granddaughter, and really KNEW her for several more years, which was incredible.

I'm certain that your momma and daddy are going to be there with you when Bird is born. They wouldn't miss it for the wide world. And it's going to be the most incredible experience in ALL of your lives!

xo CGF ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous slouchy DATE:Monday, October 29, 2007 at 11:03:00 PM EDT Oh darling, you couldn't be readier.

And your momma will see your little bird. I know it. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Ally DATE:Monday, October 29, 2007 at 11:08:00 PM EDT I'm so glad that you had a nice visit with them. And that you learned a little more about what to expect with they are visiting when Little Bird comes. The image of your Daddy playing the game, busting out in random song, having to be reminded of the rules each turn... This made me laugh and tear up simultaneously. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Jenn DATE:Monday, October 29, 2007 at 11:18:00 PM EDT I love hearing you talk about your parents. Kinda reminds me of visiting and playing with my Grands.

When the time comes, you are going to be an awesome Momma, you will be ready and we will be here to cheer you all on! ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous WhyMommy DATE:Tuesday, October 30, 2007 at 12:06:00 AM EDT You are ready. You are ALREADY Little Bird's mama. You are.

And I think you know it, too. :-)

Love to Momma and G-Daddy. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Oh, The Joys DATE:Tuesday, October 30, 2007 at 10:05:00 AM EDT I'm so glad to hear things went well with your dad! ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Heather, Queen of Shake Shake DATE:Tuesday, October 30, 2007 at 5:00:00 PM EDT What a great visit!

Let me tell you, you can only be so ready for a baby. So relax...don't worry too much about being "ready" because it can only go so far. Then you'll be in for the wildest...and bestest!...ride of your life! ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Steph DATE:Tuesday, October 30, 2007 at 7:24:00 PM EDT You are gonna be a great mommy to Bird! You do a great job with Lovely already! :)

Your parents sound amazing and its sad to know what they're going through. :(

YAY for a quiet house.. at least for a bit. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous LIBSMOM DATE:Tuesday, October 30, 2007 at 7:45:00 PM EDT We are at the point, with my Dad that we have to remind him who people are. Not key people but like parents of other kids on my son's ball team. It's sad and he doesn't understand why we're surprised when he doesn't remember who these people are. He tells random stories that aren't related to the topic of discussion in a group and has completely given up on his quest to learn how to use a computer. So, so sad really. We're all practicing how to not seem surprised anymore.
I will pray that your Mom lives a long and fulfilling life loving on her grandchildren as the grow. ----- -------- AUTHOR: Marty, a.k.a. canape TITLE: And the waiting starts again DATE: 10/09/2007 11:30:00 AM ----- BODY:
When a mother has cancer, her first thought is of her children. The days that it gets hard and she gets tired, then she also has to face the guilt stemming from knowing that if she is gone, it will be harder on her children than on her. The days when she wants to be sad about the hand she has been dealt, she has to find some happiness to share with her children.

When she calls you to tell you that her CA125 levels are back up to where they were before the last battle, and we may be looking at a break in this miraculous remission from ovarian cancer, she doesn't cry. She doesn't complain.

She asks, "Are you alright?"

Always a momma. No matter how old her children are.

Momma's take on it is here. Of course we are hoping that the numbers will come back down and not continue climbing. All we can do is wait and see.

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----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous katy DATE:Tuesday, October 9, 2007 at 1:36:00 PM EDT I HATE cancer. So many people living lives, waiting on it, never sure if it will come back. So many people who couldn't get rid of it the first time.....
Why can no one figure it out, stop it in it's tracks, fight back for those who are tired of fighting? ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Anonymous DATE:Tuesday, October 9, 2007 at 1:42:00 PM EDT You have a strong momma! I wish you both the strength to battle again. I know I become the scared kid whenever I wait for my mom's CA125's, too. No matter how old I am, she is the momma and I am the kid.
Constance, NMD ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Kevin Charnas DATE:Tuesday, October 9, 2007 at 1:58:00 PM EDT I'm sending you and your Momma my good-filled thoughts and prayers. And hoping beyond hope that it all is okay. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Perugini DATE:Tuesday, October 9, 2007 at 3:25:00 PM EDT I lost my Dad to it 8 years ago. Waiting really sucks. Know that you and your wonderful Mom are in my prayers. xoxo ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Candygirlflies DATE:Tuesday, October 9, 2007 at 3:46:00 PM EDT Canape, hoping and praying for you and your family!! Love, as always, CGF xo ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Heather, Queen of Shake Shake DATE:Tuesday, October 9, 2007 at 3:51:00 PM EDT Hugs to you. Sending lots of falling number vibes to your mama right now. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Jennifer, Playgroups Are No Place For Children DATE:Tuesday, October 9, 2007 at 3:55:00 PM EDT You captured what a Momma does beautifully. Prayers for you and YOUR Momma. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous MamaGeek @ Works For Us DATE:Tuesday, October 9, 2007 at 4:08:00 PM EDT Speechless. I can identify with you and your beautiful Momma. Sending positive thoughts and prayers your way. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Stella DATE:Tuesday, October 9, 2007 at 4:36:00 PM EDT Thinking of you and your momma and praying that those numbers go back down!!
I second Katy, I HATE cancer!

Alison ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous PunditMom DATE:Tuesday, October 9, 2007 at 5:03:00 PM EDT I'm so sorry. I hate cancer, too. Much, too much cancer. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous slouchy DATE:Tuesday, October 9, 2007 at 5:03:00 PM EDT I'm so sorry. Your momma is strong, and she is a momma, all right. I will be thinking about her and hoping that this is just a fluke. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Kathy's Surprise Party DATE:Tuesday, October 9, 2007 at 6:37:00 PM EDT Oh damn - stupid other shoe dropping. My thoughts are with you and your family. If remission happened once, it can happen again. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Stimey DATE:Tuesday, October 9, 2007 at 7:04:00 PM EDT I'll be thinking of you and your mom. I'm sorry to hear this news. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous The Farm House Kids DATE:Tuesday, October 9, 2007 at 9:12:00 PM EDT I'll be praying that her numbers no longer rise and that she is earthly healed. I know it's easy for me to say, 'hang in there' and hard for you to do. I know it's on your mind, but for all it's worth ... take care and pray that she'll be okay.

Tanya
The Dairy Wife ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Clifford DATE:Tuesday, October 9, 2007 at 9:19:00 PM EDT All that was said above and more of it. I raise my iced tea, slightly-sweetened & no lemon, to Mrs. S's good health. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous labugga DATE:Tuesday, October 9, 2007 at 10:36:00 PM EDT All the love and hugs and prayers you sent my way today? Coming right back at you. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Ally DATE:Tuesday, October 9, 2007 at 11:06:00 PM EDT Pass on all this love to your Mama and let her know we're all praying for her, out here in the internets. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Ally DATE:Tuesday, October 9, 2007 at 11:11:00 PM EDT Wow, I just stopped by your mama's blog page. You have one great mama! But I suspect you already knew that. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Bubblewench DATE:Wednesday, October 10, 2007 at 6:35:00 AM EDT You know how much I adore your mother. I will be thinking of her and praying for her.

I will be thinking of you too. :) ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Liz DATE:Wednesday, October 10, 2007 at 8:01:00 AM EDT aaaaw crap!

sending love and hugs and prayers to both you and your amazing momma. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Nancy DATE:Wednesday, October 10, 2007 at 9:38:00 AM EDT Oh, Canape. I'm thinking of you and your Momma and wishing all the best for you both as you wait... ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Bon DATE:Wednesday, October 10, 2007 at 6:49:00 PM EDT you said it so well...or rather, your Momma did.

love to you, and Momma, and Little Bird. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous gail DATE:Wednesday, October 10, 2007 at 7:32:00 PM EDT And we'll wait with you. Your Momma rocks my crocs. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Mrs. Chicken DATE:Thursday, October 11, 2007 at 12:15:00 AM EDT Oh how I hated these tests. Hated them, and the unreliable numbers. I am praying for you and your mom and your wee birdy. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Becki DATE:Thursday, October 11, 2007 at 5:48:00 PM EDT Cancer sucks.
Hope good news comes again soon. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Space Mom DATE:Wednesday, October 17, 2007 at 11:03:00 AM EDT I am so sorry this has started again.... ----- -------- AUTHOR: Marty, a.k.a. canape TITLE: Team WhyMommy: Another post to steal DATE: 10/07/2007 01:33:00 PM ----- BODY:
This is the email I have sent to my local TV news stations. Each of them has a health reporter of some kind or another. My theory is that the stations need a new spin on Breast Cancer Awareness month. So why not focus on IBC?

I would encourage you to steal this post, paste in the appropriate call letters where indicated, and send it to the TV stations in your area. We don't need them to do a story on Whymommy specifically, but we do need them to talk about IBC. We need them to help us get the word out there.

So steal it. Edit it. Send it.

Go Team WhyMommy.

***********************

October is Breast Cancer Awareness month, and I've noticed that enter TV call letters here has always been pretty involved in stories and psa's about breast cancer during that time. Maybe everything is already planned out and such, but I wanted to make sure that you were aware of a little known type of breast cancer where early detection and correct diagnosis is crucial to survival.

Inflammatory Breast Cancer is an often fatal type of breast cancer of which most people are not familiar. I only know about it because of a friend who was diagnosed recently. She is a 34 year old mother of 3 year old and 8 month old little boys and a scientist with no family history of breast cancer.

A quick look at IBC from the National Cancer Institute:
By the time women are diagnosed with IBC, it has almost always spread to the skin, making treatment difficult and categorizing it as a late stage metastatic cancer. Chemotherapy is first, followed by a mastectomy, which is followed by radiation. It wasn't long ago that IBC was a death sentence. Advances have been made, and now, "what was once universally fatal is now a disease that results in half of women diagnosed being alive in five years and one-third of women diagnosed surviving 10 or more years." (CNN) Improvements are great, but 50% survival rate? Surely we can do better than that.

Still though, if you ask 100 people, even 100 women, about IBC, it is likely that only 10 of them will have even heard of the disease. There aren't big drives for awareness or research due to the low percentages of breast cancer cases that are IBC, and also the fatality rate. It is hard to convince companies to invest in research on a disease that has such a high fatality rate. Not really a profit building move for them to make.

But it's out there. And women are dying from it because they don't seek help soon enough. Even doctors misdiagnose IBC as breast infections, delaying that necessary treatments weeks or even months. Early detection and immediate treatment is always a matter of life or death with IBC.

A group of bloggers and friends have been trying our best to spread the word about IBC. Let women know that you don't have to have a lump to have breast cancer. There is a team of over 100 bloggers dedicated to getting the word out about IBC and supporting my friend through her journey. She has written a psa about IBC which has been reposted over 350 times across the internet, resulting in most recently having the story picked up by Parents magazine for their October issue. The best place to start tracking where all we have reached is on Toddler Planet, her blog. I've linked you straight to the media page.

She goes by the name WhyMommy on the internet, trying to save some anonymity for her family. Team WhyMommy is the group of over 100 bloggers who offer her daily support by commenting on her blog, sending emails, gifts, and with local friends organizing playdates, house cleaning, and meals.

I know this is long, and if you are still with me, thanks. The point is though, that people need to know about Inflammatory Breast Cancer. Women need to know that what appears as a breast infection isn't always a breast infection. They need to know that you don't have to have a lump to have breast cancer.

I'll leave you with a few more links to get more information. If you can, please please make sure that in all of insert your station's call letters here coverage this month on breast cancer, that at least once, make sure that someone mentions IBC. You literally could save lives.

WhyMommy's PSA

IBC Symptoms

DC Metro Moms

Other news coverage


Thank you for your time and coverage on this incredibly important topic. Hopefully your station will be helping to get the word out about IBC. October is the perfect month to do it!

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----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Ally DATE:Sunday, October 7, 2007 at 6:58:00 PM EDT This is great. I will copy it to my local stations. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Candygirlflies DATE:Sunday, October 7, 2007 at 7:23:00 PM EDT Oh, my dear... This is perfect. Not only will I be sending it to tv stations, but radio stations, newspapers and magazines, too.

Thank you, thank you, thank you.

xo CGF ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Clifford DATE:Sunday, October 7, 2007 at 9:00:00 PM EDT Sweet. Be sure and let us know what kind of response you get. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Bitsy Parker DATE:Sunday, October 7, 2007 at 10:26:00 PM EDT I've always had kleptomaniac tendencies. Consider this stolen and emailed to my local health reporter (who I will have to identify).

Thanks for writing this! ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous slackermommy DATE:Monday, October 8, 2007 at 12:32:00 PM EDT You rock, girl! Let me see what I can do. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous alice c DATE:Monday, October 8, 2007 at 12:36:00 PM EDT Hi Canape,
Thank you for your thoughful response to my comment on Whymommy's post about Breast Cancer research. I am glad that I went back to read the comments because I have a clearer understanding of the issue now.
Here in the UK the problem is to ensure that money is donated to medical charities rather than animal welfare or environmental issues. Then you have to compete within the medical charity sector.

High profile media campaigns will always raise awareness and this will result in increased funds - that is why I believe that the energy that Whymommy gives to her campaign is the best possible way of increasing awareness, funding and ultimately research. It is also made even more effective by the generous support of her friends - like yourself.
Alice ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Jennifer, Playgroups Are No Place For Children DATE:Monday, October 8, 2007 at 2:23:00 PM EDT Great job!! I'm going to send this in to my local newstations right now.. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous FENICLE DATE:Monday, October 8, 2007 at 2:28:00 PM EDT Amen. I'll be sending this along to our local news stations.
Thank you. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Lisa DATE:Monday, October 8, 2007 at 9:50:00 PM EDT YEAY! THis is awesome!

THANK YOU SO MUCH. ----- -------- AUTHOR: Marty, a.k.a. canape TITLE: TWM Update DATE: 8/22/2007 03:05:00 PM ----- BODY:
Just a little update about Team Whymommy.

It has sort of taken on it's own life. With Whymommy's post on IBC popping up on blogs, in emails, and on message boards over 250 times that we have been able to count, the word is definitely getting out. Thank you for that.

I moved the list into it's own page because my blog was taking 879 years to load. You can still get to it by clicking right underneath the Team Whymommy button. If you aren't on the list and think you should be, there could be a few different explanations.

First, it could be I screwed up and just haven't added you yet. Please feel free to send me another email with your link and a gentle reminder that I suck and need to add you.

Second, it could be that you just left me a comment and have no Blogger identification. If I can't track you through your comment (if you aren't clickable or have "no-reply" set as your email preference), then I can't add you. Because I don't know where you are. Please feel free to send me an email with your link and I will add you.

Third, it could be that I went to your blog and didn't see a button. It doesn't have to be the original button even. Some people have tweaked it, added a pretty ribbon, changed the font, and that's a-ok with me. But it needs to be on your sidebar, always linking back to Toddler Planet or the Team Whymommy post. If it's just in a post, then it disappears and people won't see it after awhile. We want for it to stay on the front page all the time so that your visitors see and go, "Oh, what's this? Team Whymommy? I simply must click on this lovely button and find out more!" So please feel free to send me an email with your link if you move the button to your sidebar and want to be added.

After you link and post, you might wonder what else you can do. I do. I wonder all the time. So I keep forwarding the post. I keep talking about it. I wear my Team Whymommy shirt so that people will ask me about it.

And, I took the information to my OBGYN's office. Had a lovely little talk with the doctor about how important I thought it was for them to remember that IBC is out there. Then I gave her a sticky note pad with the address for Toddler Planet and asked her to have all the staff take a look at Whymommy's blog, which is a powerful and personal tool for IBC patients and their caregivers. She seemed genuinely surprised that I knew a 34 year old mother with IBC. And her surprise let me know that I had done the right thing.

The team was started to support Whymommy. Whymommy wants to get the word out. So that is what we are called to do. Help her get the word out.

If you have a story about an encounter you have had telling someone about IBC, please leave it in the comments or a link to it in the comments. I would love to know about it.

And by the way,






Because Izzy said to, and I think it's a nice thing to do. So go ahead, tell us who you've told about IBC and give yourself a little linky love at the same time.

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----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Mamma DATE:Wednesday, August 22, 2007 at 4:01:00 PM EDT Look at you educating your OB!!

Girl you rock in so many ways!!! ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous slouchy DATE:Wednesday, August 22, 2007 at 4:10:00 PM EDT I love the thought of the staff at OB-GYN practices around the world reading her blog. What a great idea! ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Ally DATE:Wednesday, August 22, 2007 at 8:19:00 PM EDT Aha! I love the idea of taking this info to my doc. Great ideas. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Maddie DATE:Wednesday, August 22, 2007 at 10:46:00 PM EDT I posted the same article that Lawyermama had - just in case you're still wanting to keep track.

I posted the Team Why Mommy logo in the post, but if you happen to have the HTML for the button so I could place it on my sidebar? I'd be grateful.

I hope the word keeps on spreading. I also forwarded the link to my girlfriend (an OB who delivered my son)... ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Megan/ Velveteen Mind DATE:Wednesday, August 22, 2007 at 11:19:00 PM EDT My post is finally up, along with the button, after waiting for the "perfect" opportunity for too long. This was an important one for me.

I have an OB appt next week and never thought to bring this up. I absolutely will now. Thank you again. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Jenn DATE:Thursday, August 23, 2007 at 7:40:00 AM EDT I hope it makes your page load faster; crashed me last night.

And you're like the best friend, ever.

Also, I wear my WhyMommy shirt all of the time, too, and get lots of questions about it.

Those were a great idea. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Perugini DATE:Thursday, August 23, 2007 at 9:23:00 AM EDT God bless you, chica,

xoxo ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous FENICLE DATE:Thursday, August 23, 2007 at 11:16:00 AM EDT Excellent job!! You probably just saved several women's lives by passing the info on to you OB/GYN!! I'll do the same at my annual appt in Oct. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Kathy's Surprise Party DATE:Thursday, August 23, 2007 at 10:34:00 PM EDT I got a random email from someone yesterday. Someone who doesn't read my blog. Someone who said - read this it's about this thing called IBC. I was floored. Go Team WhyMommy! ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Whymommy DATE:Thursday, August 23, 2007 at 11:38:00 PM EDT That. Is. Awesome.

Thank you -- and keep 'em coming! ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Bitsy Parker DATE:Friday, August 24, 2007 at 10:10:00 AM EDT Value wIT has a TWM link and post, but I don't think I'm on your list (valuewit.com).

Hey, did you add flowers to your Don't Take The Repeats banner? Looks great. ----- -------- AUTHOR: Marty, a.k.a. canape TITLE: One in eight is one too many DATE: 7/26/2007 11:11:00 AM ----- BODY:
Reposted from Toddler Planet. If this is something you have never seen before, please post it on your blog. If you don't have a blog, please email it to every woman in your address book. And if you haven't joined iBakeSale yet, please do that too. We need to keep fighting this battle right along with WhyMommy.

********

We hear a lot about breast cancer these days. One in eight women will be diagnosed with breast cancer in their lifetimes, and there are millions living with it in the U.S. today alone. But did you know that there is more than one type of breast cancer?

I didn’t. I thought that breast cancer was all the same. I figured that if I did my monthly breast self-exams, and found no lump, I’d be fine.

Oops. It turns out that you don’t have to have a lump to have breast cancer. Six weeks ago, I went to my OB/GYN because my breast felt funny. It was red, hot, inflamed, and the skin looked…funny. But there was no lump, so I wasn’t worried. I should have been. After a round of antibiotics didn’t clear up the inflammation, my doctor sent me to a breast specialist and did a skin punch biopsy. That test showed that I have inflammatory breast cancer, a very aggressive cancer that can be deadly.

Inflammatory breast cancer is often misdiagnosed as mastitis because many doctors have never seen it before and consider it rare. “Rare” or not, there are over 100,000 women in the U.S. with this cancer right now; only half will survive five years. Please call your OB/GYN if you experience several of the following symptoms in your breast, or any unusual changes: redness, rapid increase in size of one breast, persistent itching of breast or nipple, thickening of breast tissue, stabbing pain, soreness, swelling under the arm, dimpling or ridging (for example, when you take your bra off, the bra marks stay – for a while), flattening or retracting of the nipple, or a texture that looks or feels like an orange (called peau d’orange). Ask if your GYN is familiar with inflammatory breast cancer, and tell her that you’re concerned and want to come in to rule it out.

There is more than one kind of breast cancer. Inflammatory breast cancer is the most aggressive form of breast cancer out there, and early detection is critical. It’s not usually detected by mammogram. It does not usually present with a lump. It may be overlooked with all of the changes that our breasts undergo during the years when we’re pregnant and/or nursing our little ones. It’s important not to miss this one.

Inflammatory breast cancer is detected by women and their doctors who notice a change in one of their breasts. If you notice a change, call your doctor today. Tell her about it. Tell her that you have a friend with this disease, and it’s trying to kill her. Now you know what I wish I had known before six weeks ago.

You don’t have to have a lump to have breast cancer.

teamwhymommy

P.S. Feel free to steal this post too. I’d be happy for anyone in the blogosphere to take it and put it on their site, no questions asked. Dress it up, dress it down, let it run around the place barefoot. I don’t care. But I want the word to get out. I don’t want another young mom — or old man — or anyone in between — to have to stare at this thing on their chest and wonder, is it mastitis? Is it a rash? Am I overreacting? This cancer moves FAST, and early detection and treatment is critical for survival.

Thank you.



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----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous FENICLE DATE:Sunday, July 29, 2007 at 11:04:00 AM EDT Thank you for posting this & all the work you've done for WhyMommy. It's so important to spread the word about IBC. My own cousin, Stephanie, was diagnosed almost 3 years ago and passed away about 9 months later. It is an ugly cancer. The dr's all kept telling her it was an infection - she had no lump, it couldn't be cancer. We now know that isn't the case.

http://fenicle.com/category/stephanie/ ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous WhyMommy DATE:Sunday, July 29, 2007 at 10:26:00 PM EDT Thank you! And now... how was BlogHer?????

Do tell! ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous JHS. DATE:Saturday, August 4, 2007 at 12:17:00 AM EDT Got my t-shirt today and am going to start wearing tomorrow. I'm having lunch with friends and we just said good-bye to another friend a month ago who died of ovarian cancer (and it spread to other organs). Please add Colloquium to the wall of support (http://www.jhsiess.com).

Blessings! ----- -------- AUTHOR: Marty, a.k.a. canape TITLE: Team Whymommy Gear DATE: 7/20/2007 03:27:00 PM ----- BODY:
There are finally some shirts ready to go via cafepress.

These are not to raise money for anything; they are being sold at the base price. They are only to upgrade your already stylin' wardrobe, and promote awareness of IBC and our darling WhyMommy.

I apologize for not having them done in ample time for Blogher. I am a total loser for that. However, if you really do want one for Blogher, you could order it today and have it shipped to your hotel. Which is what I am doing.

If you aren't going to Blogher, we will miss you greatly, but I hope you will buy a shirt anyway so that people will stop you and ask questions. We want for more and more people to be aware of IBC. Raising awareness is one of the most important jobs we have. That, and keeping WhyMommy in good spirits.

Major thanks to Izzy for fixing the logo for the shirts. She rocks my socks.

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----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous slouchy DATE:Friday, July 20, 2007 at 4:55:00 PM EDT Thanks for doing this! And thanks to Izzy, too! ----- --------