AUTHOR: Marty, a.k.a. canape TITLE: Yet another thing I will worry stupidly over and then later wonder why I did DATE: 9/03/2008 10:19:00 AM ----- BODY:
Liam Finn. I have proclaimed my love for Liam Finn more than once.

The last time Kevin and I saw Liam Finn live, we were in Portland, Oregon. It was a year ago this past weekend, and we had flown across the country to see Crowded House, and our friend Tattoo Dave.

It was a crazy thing to do, and one of the best weekends ever.

Liam Finn, who is hands down the most riveting performer I have ever seen, is playing in Chapel Hill this weekend. Sunday night. At the Local 506. For only $10.

Far less expensive than the last time we saw him.

But now there is a Little Bird, and he goes to bed at 8:00. There is the matter of a babysitter.

Our former nanny has turned us down. Too late at night, on a Sunday, I imagine. There is one other girl who I would trust to be here, and I'm waiting to hear back from her.

Lovely was a huge sweetheart and said that she would babysit him. I would totally let her too. She is wonderful with him, and I would rather leave him with his sister than anyone else. However, we would be a good 30 minute drive away, and aren't leaving the two children with no driver available should anything happen. Plus, it's a school night, and she needs to go to bed shortly after Mr. Kicky does. This just isn't the situation for sister to babysit.

It's just a short evening, late at night. I could just get another sitter. There are other sitters.

The children are going to be sleeping. It's not a big deal.

Right?

The prospect of leaving them here with someone else, even someone with vast experience? I'm having a hard time with it.

I'm thinking I need to loosen up.

So when did you leave your little ones with a sitter for the first time to do something fun? Any tips on how to get over myself?

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----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Andria and Co. DATE:Wednesday, September 3, 2008 at 11:26:00 AM EDT I am no help... I haven't left Blake once, won't even leave him with Jason.
Ailane? I parted with when she went to kindergarten.
See? No help. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous toddlerplanet DATE:Wednesday, September 3, 2008 at 11:49:00 AM EDT I'll let you know.

But Grammy says they did fine with her while we were away overnight last weekend (surgery). Wish I could share her with you today.... ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Bubblewench DATE:Wednesday, September 3, 2008 at 12:37:00 PM EDT I'm useles here. But I like this post because it shows how much you care and how much of a MOM you have totally become. You're a mom. It's really cool. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Susie DATE:Wednesday, September 3, 2008 at 1:14:00 PM EDT Well after three kids, you'd think I'd have some good advice. I got nothin'.
"Logan" was Christopher's age when we took him with us to see Madeline Peyroux at the Carolina Theatre and I nursed him to sleep right there, surrounded by all the jazz. And then we left early, about an hour after she came on stage, because we had to get home to the kids. That's really the last time we've been out.
And I'm glad to hear that there are more moms out there that do not take leaving their children lightly. It makes me feel better.
There's nothing about you that you need to get over. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Spacemom DATE:Wednesday, September 3, 2008 at 1:54:00 PM EDT Okay-
With my first, it was 15 months (not counting daycare)
With my second, it was 3 months
What I learned was this:
You have to go with your comfort level. Honestly? I would trust Lovey and let her watch him. What does she need to know?
a) basic first aid
b) infant CPR would be nice, but unlikely she would need it
c) how to dial 911

Take the WORSE case scenario... Something goes wrong with LB. Lovey checks vitals, calls 911. Asks for an ambulance first. Report the status of LB and request assistence (if needed, infant CPR is pretty easy...you can even watch some internet videos to get the basics.. Make sure the airway is clear, 2 breaths (or not)....two fingers on the chest, depress the chest 1/3 of the way down, 30 seconds on...2 breaths (cover nose and mouth if needed) 30 seconds of compression....ABC airways clear...breath...compression.

Okay..now that I've terrified you. Think hard. What situation would happen that she would NEED CPR? What is the worst situation you have been in with LB?
Probably nothing more than a cough or so.

Odds are against anything happening. If you stay home? Same odds as if you go out.

My personal opinion? go. Let Lovey get some experience babysitting (it will build her confidence). Have a night for you and Guy. YES you can call 20 times during the night. Heck, have Lovey text you for every diaper change and burp if you want. It's okay to be Canape and not mom for a few hours. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Spacemom DATE:Wednesday, September 3, 2008 at 1:56:00 PM EDT ETA:
I've never had to use CPR on my kids, but I am trained. Also I have had to take Luna to the hospital 3 times so far (she's 4 years old...2 times for illness 1 for a concussion). Things DO happen, but odds are against it. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Stella DATE:Wednesday, September 3, 2008 at 2:15:00 PM EDT I was just going to do a post on this!

We had a sitter when our son was born who was wonderful. A former student of mine. She was with us since he was about 4 months old. GREAT!

She has cared for both of our children and I trust everything about her. She is now in college and gone most of the time. I am now at a point where we need another sitter but I am too nervous to trust anyone else.

It's hard to leave them. I'm fine with leaving them with my parents but I know that's not an option for you. I really think it's a leap of faith for you. If you trust the person you have chosen and you have checked everything and dotted every I I think it's a matter of moving beyond your own fears.

It's really hard!!! ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Unkempt Mommy DATE:Wednesday, September 3, 2008 at 3:16:00 PM EDT I struggle with this as well. I don't have any family nearby and my IL's have never watched Scout. BUT we have a few really close friends that I do trust to leave her with. I just try to tell myself that it's okay if she cries a little and that the person watching her will probably be even more paranoid and cautious with her than I am (Because obviously they don't want some careless accident to happen on their watch)
i.e. I have been known to let her dance on the coffee table and chomp on a whole unpeeled apple (not at the same time LOL :) and the babysitter probably wouldn't - KWIM?

I text message whomever's watching her frequently for updates. That said, I honestly never fully relax and let go during the few times we've left her with friends, but I still manage to have a good time somehow.

I think I would have a SUPER tough time leaving her with someone that wasn't a very close friend, though.

As for leaving him w/ Lovely, I think you have to trust your gut. If you don't think its the best situation for her to test out her babysitting skills, then you DEFINITELY won't end up having a good time at all, so it wouldn't even be worth it. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Marty, a.k.a. canape DATE:Wednesday, September 3, 2008 at 3:28:00 PM EDT I think Lovely would do a great job, but she has to go to bed herself because she has school the next day. So it is not that I don't think she can, KWIM? ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Daily Verses DATE:Wednesday, September 3, 2008 at 4:10:00 PM EDT I have a hard time leaving my guys, too. I really have only left them w/ family, with the exception of the week we closed on our house. That week they had to go w/ 3 different close friends on 3 occasions. But like everyone said, trust your gut. You won't enjoy yourself if you're too worried.

The few people who have watched my kids have been from my church; they're people I know well and trust immensely. Do you have any social circles/church with folks that you're close to? Maybe that's a good place to look. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous @sweetbabboo DATE:Wednesday, September 3, 2008 at 10:25:00 PM EDT I can't really offer much since I haven't left Linus with anyone but family. I think the first time we left him with anyone was when he was 5 months.

I agree with some of the other moms in that you should get someone you totally trust.... maybe even do a mini test run first. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous katy DATE:Wednesday, September 3, 2008 at 10:39:00 PM EDT My daughter just turned 18...if she is home alone I get sick to my stomach. We never go anywhere that will make us gone after dark if she is home. My big problem is the fact that we do not have "next door" neighbors and no cell service. I always picture someone cutting the phone lines and her not being able to get help. I know that sounds paranoid but if something would happen I would never forgive myself.
So to answer your question....I don't know. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous becky DATE:Monday, September 8, 2008 at 12:19:00 AM EDT I'm no help - I haven't left the boy with anyone except sister or dad. But I totally get your worries. I didn't even want to leave him in daycare, which is why I'm now working from home. ----- --------