AUTHOR: Marty, a.k.a. canape TITLE: Up for interpretation DATE: 1/14/2008 01:20:00 PM ----- BODY:
There is this dream that I keep having lately. It has various details, but some of the basics are the same. The one I remember most vividly starts out with me going into labor at home.

When Guy arrives home, he isn't the Guy I know, but instead, he is a large Hispanic man who works as a janitor. It is still Guy, but it isn't. And I can't understand a word he says because all he speaks is Spanish.

From there, I wake up in the hospital to find that I had already had the baby. He looks like a blond haired, blue eyed Cabbage Patch doll and never blinks. He won't have anything to do with breastfeeding.

I can't remember any of the birth. When I ask Guy about it, he just continues to speak Spanish to me. Then, I realize that we had forgotten to call the doula when I went into labor. There is no one to tell me about my labor and delivery. When I get up from the bed, I find that I have an incision across the bottom of my belly that was most certainly from a c-section, but everyone insists that I didn't have one.

Things are a little sketchy after we leave the hospital. We have some errands to run, and I don't know what happened to the baby. All I know is that I thought I kept losing him, but it always turned out that someone else was just taking care of him for me. Whenever I tried to get him back, they would turn me away telling me that they had it covered and I should just go on and get done what I needed to get done. I just wanted them to give him back to me.

That's it. The recurring dream. I don't think it's hard to interpret.

I obviously have some anxiety that I haven't consciously worked through. Then again, I don't feel anxious during the day. I feel excited. I guess I should spend a little time though, on the glaringly obvious fears I still have.

It's probably very wrong to be amused at myself for being so ridiculous and for having such transparent dreams. Makes me feel quite silly.

I'm officially ready for him to be here so I can start worrying about him in person. Face to face.

Labels: , ,

----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Becki DATE:Monday, January 14, 2008 at 1:36:00 PM EST Yikes! Is it too late to learn Spanish?
Just kidding! I'm sure everything will be fine :) ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous toddlerplanet DATE:Monday, January 14, 2008 at 3:35:00 PM EST 11 days! 11 days! 11 days!

Any day now, babe! Whoo-hoo!

(You know now if you miss a day of blogging we'll all think you're in labor....) ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Slackermommy DATE:Monday, January 14, 2008 at 5:58:00 PM EST I had crazy dreams also in the last few weeks of my pregnancies. The disturbing ones came in the days following birth. Pregnancy and birth can wreak havoc on our psyche! ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Paige Jennifer DATE:Monday, January 14, 2008 at 7:43:00 PM EST I just love the visual of a janitor with like a hundred keys jingling on his belt while you're spurting out a baby - no speakoh fajita, el fuckeroh

(bite me - I took French in high school) ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Candygirlflies DATE:Monday, January 14, 2008 at 9:13:00 PM EST If you've hit The Land Of Crazy Dreams, then it won't be long now!!! Yippee!!

I, too, had psycho-dreams... but by the end of the pregnancies, they were mostly about killing my husband...

xoxo CGF ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous katy DATE:Monday, January 14, 2008 at 10:18:00 PM EST I think we always have weird dreams but at times we don't sleep as soundly and remember them. I bet at this stage of your pregnancy you aren't sleeping as well as normal.
11 days to go! ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Stimey DATE:Monday, January 14, 2008 at 10:37:00 PM EST I'm sure I had crazy dreams too when I was pregnant, but the one I remember the most vividly was when Sam was a couple/few months old and we put him in his crib downstairs for the first time at night. I dreamed that I put him to bed on the bench in an outdoor shed.

Also pretty transparent, huh? ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous gail DATE:Monday, January 14, 2008 at 11:05:00 PM EST You? Scare me just a little. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Imstell DATE:Monday, January 14, 2008 at 11:27:00 PM EST My dream baby was a doll whose eyes opened when you picked her up... only when you laid her down her eyes sunk down into her face followed quickly by her nose. And she slept in a shoe box under my bed. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Tiffany DATE:Tuesday, January 15, 2008 at 11:04:00 AM EST Crazy dreams!! After Prayse was born I always woke up thinking I had lost her. For the first month and a half I would wake up in a panic and literally be pulling the covers off of the bed looking for her (she was always in her bassinet). ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Clifford DATE:Tuesday, January 15, 2008 at 1:11:00 PM EST le freak, c'est chic...

They show clips at Sundance about that kind of thing, dearest. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Kathy's Surprise Party DATE:Tuesday, January 15, 2008 at 4:06:00 PM EST I had crazy dreams about K's birth and I wasn't even the one pregnant. Mine were "loosing" him dreams as well. Enjoy the dreams as it will be along time before you sleep soundly enough to have them again. ;-) ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Jessica DATE:Tuesday, January 15, 2008 at 4:54:00 PM EST Well I'd say you need to get yourself an interpreter AND a doula! :) wow. That's really laced with meaning isn't it? It's amazing what our mind does to us when we let our guard down. Thanks for all the hugs btw, I've really needed them recently :) ----- --------