AUTHOR: Marty, a.k.a. canape TITLE: Nothing to read here DATE: 12/07/2007 10:07:00 AM ----- BODY:
Things you say, things you write, you can't take back. You put them out there, and no matter what your intentions were, it's up to the person listening or reading to interpret it.

So your words are powerful, but you don't hold all the power.

I hurt someone with words today. It's barely midmorning and I'm already on a roll. The thing is, I completely meant to be loving and supportive. Understanding. And I totally screwed it up because I didn't understand exactly how they felt in the first place.

It's been a bad morning.

To start things off, I've had to make hard decisions that make me look weak and small when in reality they are just protecting a little girl who I love very much. But I'm tired of sacrificing. Letting selfishness, immaturity, and instability seem to win out. Of course, it isn't about me, so I will continue to do what is right. It shouldn't be about the adults. It should be about the child. And the child shouldn't have to take care of the adults. It's just sick.

Pathetic is a better word. Tragic would work, except it implies that the situation was unavoidable. Which it isn't.

I digress.

Today, I am wishing that I was better with words. Wishing that I wasn't scared to actually talk versus trying to write everything out.

Wishing that I hadn't misunderstood my friend so much.

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----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Stella DATE:Friday, December 7, 2007 at 11:18:00 AM EST You are so very right about words.
I am so sorry that you are in what appears to be quite a heavy situation.

Thinking of you and sending you strength- you've got a lot on your own, too! ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Andria DATE:Friday, December 7, 2007 at 11:34:00 AM EST I could probably say so much here- but, I will keep my mouth shut. But, I will say this- Thank GOD Lovely has you for a stepmother. Someone who is wise beyond her years, and is always thinking of what is at heart- the child. Lovely will remember this in years to come- that she had someone to support her, while she had to deal with the immaturity and jealous behaviors of another.
Sad, sad situation.
Hugs to you, the hubby, and both lovelies. (The one who is here, and the one who we will meet soon!) ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Mamma DATE:Friday, December 7, 2007 at 12:12:00 PM EST Ugh. This doesn't sound good. Written words can be tough because there is such room to misinterpret meaning.

I hope this all works out.

I'm here if you need to vent--always. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Steph DATE:Friday, December 7, 2007 at 12:16:00 PM EST Words are a very challenging thing as we cannot take them back and even when we are using them to try to comfort someone they can be misunderstood and hurtful.

And, I wish I could come hug you as I TOTALLY understand how you can be made to feel small and weak by doing the right thing to protect a child. Its ALL about whats best for the child and some people FAIL to see that! Keep doing whats right and trust that in the end, Lovely will see that in you. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous labugga DATE:Friday, December 7, 2007 at 12:16:00 PM EST What Andria said. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Kathy DATE:Friday, December 7, 2007 at 12:38:00 PM EST So true. If there's one thing I've learned it's that there's always room for misinterpretation. And writing it, publishing it -- it's almost impossible to go back. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Space Mom DATE:Friday, December 7, 2007 at 2:34:00 PM EST You said it, Words hold the power, but not all of it...

A simple apology for misunderstanding goes a long way.... ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Jenn DATE:Friday, December 7, 2007 at 3:38:00 PM EST {{{HUGS}}} That's all. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous jennifer DATE:Friday, December 7, 2007 at 4:16:00 PM EST I'm sorry this is weighing so heavily upon you. I hope it's all resolved. Soon.

Jennifer, Le Binky Bitch ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Jessica DATE:Friday, December 7, 2007 at 7:33:00 PM EST Words really are so powerful... And so many times even though we MEAN to say the right thing, those friggin powerful words get totally in the way. I'm sorry your day got off on the wrong foot... I hope that by now the day has ended well and all of this is behind you... We all know you well enough to say that you couldn't possibly do anything to deliberately hurt us... ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Cathy DATE:Friday, December 7, 2007 at 11:59:00 PM EST I can tell part of this is coming from a stepmom...

I know. I know so well.

My stepkids are here tonight and I keep looking at the 16-year-old thinking, "How do we handle these issues that have come up lately, issues his mom denies?"

I want to sit him down for a long talk. But I fear overstepping my bounds, because, as I'm reminded by the adults in his life, I'm not the mom.

*sigh*

Hope tomorrow's better. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous katy DATE:Saturday, December 8, 2007 at 12:49:00 AM EST I hope you get this problem resolved soon, waiting can sometimes make the problem seem worse. You are such a lovely person I know your words were probably not meant to upset the recipient. ----- --------