AUTHOR: Marty, a.k.a. canape TITLE: Right now. Right where I am. DATE: 3/26/2009 05:54:00 PM ----- BODY:
I'm crossing the line of another "I never" tonight. I'm going to play bunko. Although I have no idea what bunko actually is, I do know that until now, no one I have ever wanted to hang out with has played it.

Things change.

Kevin and I have decided to stay in the neighborhood where we are now. The house isn't as big as he would like. It isn't as new as he thinks I would like. It isn't as close to his work as either of us would like. However, it's ours. We remodeled it together to be just as we wanted it, and we love it. Well, I love it anyway. I love this house.

When we made the decision to stay, I made the decision to try and become part of the community that we live in. Here, wrapped safely in my words, I have no problem becoming a part of the community. I may flit from branch to branch within the community, but I do feel a part of it all.

Tonight I will have to wear something other than my written words.

My doula said to me last week after a reiki session that I needed to talk. That writing was fine, but there was a certain power given to words when they physically come out of the mouth. I'm paraphrasing, but that was the gist. She is so right.

Me don't talk so good.

But these are the women who are raising their children around mine. They are the women who play at the park. They are the women who will be at the neighborhood pool this summer. I want to know them and be a part of their community, and I want for my child to be a part as well. I think that it's important. Besides, I really like the women I have met so far, and at the very least we have motherhood in common. I find that motherhood can be a huge common ground.

I shouldn't forget to mention that having the coolest across the street neighbor to usher me into the community doesn't hurt. Maybe I'll change clothes 18 times before I leave tonight, but I'll leave with a little more confidence because I've already made a friend.

Now I must go stand and stare blankly at the content of my closet, hoping to find something that has less peanut butter on it than the jar I am wearing at the moment.

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----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous nikki DATE:Thursday, March 26, 2009 at 7:13:00 PM EDT I hope all goes well and you make some new friends.

I had a similar experience last week when I went to a knitting group hosted by my ONE neighborhood mom friend (okay, I am on friendly speaking terms with one other one, I suppose, but she is the mother of the girl who babysits for us, so I don't know if that counts). I actually do knit, very very little (mostly flat things), but had never been to any sort of neighborhood get-together. I too am TERRIBLY AWKWARD in many social situations, and not even because I'm shy, but because I'm AWKWARD. I had fun, made some friends, and I hope you do too. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Magpie DATE:Thursday, March 26, 2009 at 8:42:00 PM EDT Bunko - what IS bunko? Have fun... ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Stella DATE:Thursday, March 26, 2009 at 9:19:00 PM EDT I hope you have a wonderful time. I've never played Bunko but I hear it's tons of fun!! Enjoy yourself.

You'll be matter what you wear! ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous pastormargaret DATE:Thursday, March 26, 2009 at 9:46:00 PM EDT Alenda plays Bunko and it was really big at Fair Oaks so there must be something fun about it. I'm glad you have gone. I missed being invited to play bridge or be a part of some "lady's" group. I guess your reluctance comes naturally. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous @sweetbabboo DATE:Thursday, March 26, 2009 at 11:17:00 PM EDT Ok, you crack me up because it totally could have been me writing this.

I'm so bad at social situations. Even when I go out with friends I get all worked up, become determined I am not going, and then ultimately have a good time. I wonder if most bloggers are like that. I write because it gives me time to compose my thoughts. I'm really not good on the spot and usually spend my time at social gatherings listening even if I'd like to be talking. When I host gatherings, I busy myself with getting things and preparing food because making conversation is so much more difficult.

Glad you had a good time.

Awkwardly yours,
Abby ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Convertible Girl DATE:Friday, March 27, 2009 at 1:57:00 PM EDT It's me -- the across the street neighbor, who needs to add that I'm only the coolest because the people on one side of us are quiet and a little older and the people on the other side of us just moved out and took their Virgin Mary statue and entourage with them. But I'll take it ;) And I'm so very glad you came with me to Bunco (where we didn't even play). ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous whymommy DATE:Friday, March 27, 2009 at 11:11:00 PM EDT Great! How was bunco? ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous Becki DATE:Sunday, March 29, 2009 at 2:32:00 PM EDT Hope you had a great time :) I played bunko once with some people I didn't know before was a good time. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR:Anonymous TinaGirl DATE:Sunday, March 29, 2009 at 4:37:00 PM EDT I sub for a bunch of bunco groups so I never have to have it at my house and I get to go pretty much whenever I want. LOL. Being 31, a mom of 2 crazy little boys and being socially akward doesn't do much for my social life. But I can play bunco. ----- --------